Have wise words and responses ready!
Do you find yourself in uncomfortable situations, feel bullied and not sure how to respond? Do you get caught up in other people’s issues, drained of energy and made to feel exhausted?
If you are a sensitive person, like me, you may have found yourself in uncomfortable situations, or even bullying circumstances and felt at a loss on how to respond. If so, I completely understand!
Whenever I felt vulnerable, I would research-wise words to help me feel better. I knew I needed to go further and learn how to respond wisely and naturally, whenever I felt vulnerable again. The outcome became by ‘Wise Guidance Checklist’ which empowered me with the confidence I needed to be ready for the next time. Nectar to my soul.
In his article, I will show you my wise guidelines, and a couple of my success stories, with the intention to help you, to inspire you to create your own.
Have your sentences ready and rehearsed
When feeling verbally attacked and vulnerable, I learned by having rehearsed my responses over and over in my mind beforehand really helped.
“Thank you so much for sharing”, said in a respectful way, which helps to cut the energy of tension.
Give yourself permission to pause and if necessary, respond later by having a practiced sentence you can call upon.
For example:
“Thank you so much for sharing, (following with) …
“… let me think about that and get back to you
“… just give me a moment to digest this”, or
“… I’ll get back to you later”.
Don’t worry if it feels awkward at first, I practiced it over and over in my mind until the responses became natural.
My experience
The very first time I used “Thank you so much for sharing” in a natural way was in a business meeting many years ago. The 15 staff who were at the meeting like me, had only just met the facilitator that day. I was the receptionist and when he arrived earlier, I had welcomed him, as I did with everyone, with enthusiasm and a big smile.
For the oddest reason he decided I was a safe person to choose a discussion on the subject of personality traits. He proceeded by expressing his impression of what he considered my negative side would be. He, who was greeted with love by me, had quite unkind words to say.
My immediate response, in a genuine respectful way was “Thank you so much for sharing!”
The facilitator found he needed to change the subject. He was caught off guard as he received no support or criticism from me on the flow he was on.
I have a feeling he was hoping I would respond in a way which proved his ‘negative side’ theory correct.
It wasn’t until after the meeting was over, when my colleagues came to me, sharing with such excited support at how well I had handled him, that I realised the power of that sentence.
I soon had all the staff who were at that meeting practicing it.
Respond with a question
The Good Life Ladies have a show in which they discuss how to deal with what they call “Judgy Mc Judgersons” (judgemental people) and in the show Belle explains:
Questions are way more powerful than answers!
When faced with someone who is judgemental or critical, Belle suggests the most powerful question is…
What is your intention behind that comment?
Some may not be aware of how they make people feel by the words they use, so by asking them what their intention is, it gives them an opportunity to express their words differently.
A few more questions which may be helpful to follow are:
Can you help me understand?
What is it you are trying to do?
Are you trying to be helpful, help me understand?
Reflection Point:
Think of a situation which you know you could have handled better, but not quite sure how.
You are only responsible for how you are – not how other people are. At the end of this article, decide how different you would best handle this situation if it ever happens again.
Never reprimand
Determine how you want the outcome to be, and focus on aiming for how best to create the solutions ahead.
Never defend
As soon as I am tempted to defend myself – bang, I immediately feel the resistance. It doesn’t work and it has no value to the outcome.
If I must say something, “Thank you” or “Thank you for sharing” or the question “what is your intention behind that comment?” Silence does not necessarily mean submission.
Allow others to come close to you, and allow others to move away
Abraham Hicks explains to this doesn’t mean withdrawing love, it means, you may instead choose to send love – at a distance. Below is a personal story in which, in doing so, I gained a great deal of personal power.
My experience
There is someone whom I love very much in my family, but everytime we had family gatherings, which was quite often at the time, he would find a reason to be angry and yell at me in front of everyone. I decided to do something about this situation and felt inspired to write him a letter.
In the letter I explained how much I loved him. I shared the special memories of him which I will keep forever in my heart. I then explained that when we have family gatherings, we (my husband, stepchildren and I) would arrive early, enjoy everyone, then when his family arrived, we would leave. They were always late at family gatherings, so it made perfect sense. I explained that I still loved him, but I now choose to send him love at a distance. I explained to everyone in my extended family this is what we will be doing, so everyone understood our actions.
He never admitted to receiving the letter, however he gave me the most beautiful hug when he arrived the next time. It was such a special moment, I then gathered my husband and stepchildren, hugged everyone goodbye and left.
To othis day, almost 30 years later, I still send love to my brother – at a distance.
It feels good to move away, and still love him anyway.
Let go of justifying
Learning to ‘let go’ is sensational. It takes practice, but when you do, it’s awesome. As soon as I am tempted to jusify myself, I command myself to STOP! I breathe in, drop my shoulders, and let go as I breathe out. Forgive and send love instead.
Let go of rationalising
We are far better off thinking thoughts that make us feel better. Love people for who they are and not who you want them to be, and forgive.
Forgive
Forgiveness does not condone another’s bad behavior, it releases the negative cord of attachment which causes emotional pain and your energy to be drained.
Ask for help from your higher intuitive self
I know my letter in the story above was an inspiration I received from my higher intuitive self – and it really worked.
If this concept is new to you, the below online course which is free called ‘Activate your Intuition’ will be the perfect foundation for any inner being journey of self love and growth for you.
You will confidently connect with your higher intuitive self – and more.
Look for reasons to feel good and look for things to appreciate
The idea is to feel good inside. When we feel good, we are happy. Our happiness is the best possible gift to give another. Spending time to appreciate and focus on the good in your life is the best way to manifest more good things in accordance with the Law of Attraction. Looking for reasons to feel good and things to appreciate magnitises the good feeling situations I would much prefer experience.
You may find my blog article How to uplift your thoughts to feel better helpful with techniques to uplift the way you feel.
Support Invocation
If you are feeling ill with negative emotion as you are about to set off on your day and know you are going to face a difficult situation, the following invocation will help you by allowing the great beings of divine light and divine mother to support you.
“I ask the Source of all Creation to please create for me a crystalline temple of light for around me. I invite all my high level guides, masters and great beings of light to please join me.
Please clear and cleanse all energies which are not of the light and fill this temple with the highest, brightest and most radiant light and the raised vibrations needed for my healing, my growth and my light.
Under the Divine Light of the highest order, thank you great beings of light and divine mother for embracing, loving and supporting me.
Thank you Archangel Michael for cutting and carrying away fears and emotions not serving me, dissolving blockages and past life contracts, and any beliefs which are interfering with my happiness, health and abundance.
Thank you Archangel Raphael for healing my wounds and the wounds of all others involved.”
Listen to your body wisdom
If you sense yourself feeling anger, rage, fear or have a judgement or belief of what is right and wrong – recognise you have thoughts that are adding fuel to holding you back.
Every inspirational leader began their journey by listening to their intuition. You can activate this within you too – it’s easy and life changing.
The ‘Open to your Heart Power’ masterclass video will help you with transforming those thoughts each time you are triggered, so you can move forward with what you love to do.
My Guides explain:
“We in the higher planes see the changes that are taking place, we can see how each and every one of you is making a difference by shining your light.”
How to open to your heart power
If my words resonate with you, or feel good to you, the below ‘Open to your Heart Power’ Masterclass video may just be your perfect next most important step.
What you will experience…
You will be gently guided in how to:
- Co-create your life with your best friend – your Soul, to see your life through the lens of a higher perspective.
- Confidently ‘listen’ to the words of your Soul, have conversations, asking investigative questions – to ‘determine’ the highest way forward for you in every situation you face.
- Enlist the support of your Soul to release any emotions holding you back.
- Let your annoying or painful thoughts go with an easy practice you can do at any time during your day.
- Reframe your belief system so you feel supported by your thoughts rather than held down.
- Listen to the inner healer within you, so you are inspired to care for your body and listen to its needs.
- How to open to the most incredible heart journey of inner harmony, inner power, and, in doing so, you become… an inspiration to those around you in living a heart powered way of being – just by being you.
You can experience ‘Open to your Heart Power’ in your own time
Make sure you have a pen and notebook ready, because you will be channeling your Soul and your Inner Healer and it’s more effective if you write the answers down.
It’s surprising when you re-visit what you have written at a later time, because you experience the answers with fresh eyes, and a different frame of mind.
Have fun with it, I find the higher dimensions have a great sense of humour.
Hugest love,
Robyn
Intuitive teacher and channeler